Have you ever watched someone eat banana? Most will start at the “pop top” and try to break it free. The process can be quite messy. And yet with our higher intelligence we keep doing the same thing over and over again – hoping the outcome will be better the next time around.

Now go to a local zoo and watch the monkeys for a while. You will see that monkeys turn the banana upside down (to our way of thinking) and open from the “bottom end” and finish it off quickly — without mess or fuss. How many of us have picked up on this clue?

So what has this to do with preventing domestic abuse? Actually, it’s a life lesson.

What most of us call the bottom is actually the top and the so called “pop top” is the really the stem that grows up from the bottom of the plant.

Discovering the best solution to a troubling situation sometimes requires us to step back and look at things from a new perspective. It is not easy to do but the end result can be quite empowering.

Holding on to the hope that things will be different the next time around in an abusive relationship is both a messy and potentially dangerous situation.

Perhaps its time to look at your relationships from a different point of view. It may be the right time to recognize the hard brass monkey you are involved with is not going to change back into the prince charming of your dreams.